• Change that consists of improving what already is
• Change that consists of creating something totally new
• Change that operates from questions rather than answers

These same orders of change also apply to personal growth and development.

Improving what already is:

There are two aspects to this. The first is building on your strengths. What do you do well that can be applied in new, additional, or innovative ways for creating greater value, contributing more, and having a greater impact? The second way is deepening and sharpening existing skill sets to take you to new levels of proficiency. In essence, enabling you to progress from “good to great,” as Jim Collins discusses in his book by that title. These forms of personal growth usually occur gradually, step by step.

Creating something totally new:

You can create something new within or about yourself and outside of yourself. Consider these questions for each:

Within or about yourself: What behaviors can you change or refocus? What change have you been resisting that you can try? It may sound counterintuitive, but attitude change usually follows behavior change. So by changing your actions you can change your way of thinking and how you perceive matters. You can grow as a person, refresh your life, and deepen your viewpoint by doing something totally new. Stretch yourself.

Outside of yourself: What does not exist in your life that you can create? What new arena of achievement can you pursue? What does not exist in the world or in your area that if it did would make a positive difference? How can you rejuvenate yourself and the people or world around you – whether that’s in your home, workplace, school, community, or society? Begin within your sphere of influence. You are at the center of it so start with yourself and then more outward. As you do, you will expand your sphere of influence. By creating something new, you alter what you are and the world around you. These may be medium, long-term or permanent improvements with a lasting impact.

Operating from questions rather than answers:

This form of change may be linked to the second. It revolves around continually asking yourself transformative questions such as:

• How can I get better? How can I continually grow and improve? How can I have a bigger impact?
• What is confining my thinking? How can I move beyond outmoded paradigms? Why am I stuck and what can propel me forward? How can I make that happen?
• What assumptions am I operating under and how can I challenge or test them? What are my assumptions based on? Are they based on facts, complete or partial information, or opinions of others? How can I widen or deepen my understanding? How can I look at things in a more fresh or more systemic way?
• How can I learn from the success of others? What are new and better ways of achieving goals?

When we continually strive to improve who we are and what we do, challenge ourselves and our assumptions, and seek deeper or more comprehensive knowledge, we grow personally and professionally. The three orders of change can be woven into the fabric of our lives, so we can truly flourish today and over the course of time. All it takes is commitment, a future-oriented perspective, an open mind, and action to propel the process. Now is a great time to start!

~ Philippians 4:8 NIV

How often do your thoughts stray from that Biblical advice? Regardless of your faith, consider the wisdom in such words. Consider how much more content your life might be if you embraced them.

Our thoughts affect so much about our lives. What we believe is important and where we place our priorities. Or moods. Our health. There is something to be said for mind over matter.

What happens when you allow your thoughts to dwell on mistakes and what might have been? What happens when you focus in the negative rather than the positive, or what you don’t have instead of what you do? Do those thoughts inspire you or contribute to feeling discontent? Do they help you move past unfortunate events or choices? Do they motivate you to pursue possibilities or to languish? Do they help you create a better future? Do they help you to do your best or be the best person you can be?

It seems negative thoughts can easily crowd out positive ones. It’s doubtful that they can share the same mind space. In a given day, how much “mind share” does each occupy in your brain?

Our thoughts affect our behavior and our success. So what you think has a significant impact on your future. It also affects how happy and content you feel today, how at peace you are with yourself. As Socrates said “Contentment is natural wealth.”

When you feel negative thoughts seep into your brain, or lodge themselves there, remind yourself of Philippians 4:8. Release those detrimental thoughts as quickly as they enter your consciousness. Keep your mind on that which is good, noble, lovely, admirable, praiseworthy, constructive and positive. Your contentment and future depend on it.

The basic story: the Israelites were slaves in Egypt, where they were victims of harsh labor and beatings. God, through the messenger Moses, brought them out from bondage into freedom. This essential kernel of the Jewish narrative has the commandment within it to recount the story each year and to teach it to our children, so that they, too, can continue to recount it as they mature.

Why? For some the answer would be: to remember. We must remember our roots. That’s one important reason. But according to Jewish teaching, while significant, remembering alone falls miserably short. For we are reminded again and again in our sacred texts to extend ourselves to the stranger, the widow, the orphan, the elder, the blind and the deaf– individuals who serve to represent all the needy in our community – because we know how it feels to be the stranger, to be the one who is oppressed. In fact, we are commanded to open our homes and our tables so that all who are hungry may come and eat. The value of Israelite slavery, according to Kabbalistic traditions, is to have us break that chain, for through it we learned to be sensitive to those in need and to have compassion for their pain. Having cultivated sensitivity and compassion, we are commanded then to act to eradicate injustice and alleviate suffering throughout the world.

Seders this year and in years past have included multiple faiths at their table to facilitate dialogues to help overcome the narrow understanding that one faith may have of another. The word for Egypt in Hebrew isMitzrayim, which literally means, “the narrow places.” We go from the narrow place of enslavement to the broad expanse of freedom, not just as a nation, but as individuals, not just historically, but today as well. We must challenge ourselves to examine where we hold narrow, self-limiting beliefs as well as beliefs that minimize or diminish others.

Toward this end, many seders include a fifth question – an addition to the traditional four that explore why the Passover night is different from all other nights. Some fifth questions asked at seders this year include:

• Why on this night are millions of people going hungry?
• Why are so many still enslaved and tortured around the world?
• What steps can we take to ensure greater economic justice in our cities?
• How can we promote equal rights for people of all races, ethnicities and religions?
• How can we ensure that our food is produced in an ethical and ecologically sustainable way?
• What are some things we can do every day to help those around come out of the self-imposed bondage and slavery that they experience in their own lives?
• How can we continue to honor aiding strangers and family alike with this next year?
• Why is religion so often a force in politics?
• How can we make this year different from all other years?

You may find yourself adding your own questions to this list, either from your seder or from your personal commitment to repair our world. Ultimately, the message of Passover is at once simple and complex. Simple: treat all people with justice, kindness and equity; make sure that everyone has enough food, shelter, clothing, health care, love. Treat others the way you’d want them to treat you. The complexity is in the doing. The complexity is in overcoming our fears of people who look or behave differently than we do. It is in addressing the selfishness that impels us to want more even when it means that someone else has less. It is in facing the arrogance that enables us to overindulge use of our earth’s resources without recognizing that we are robbing our own children. It is in overcoming inertia, ambivalence and/or despair that we have regarding taking action to live the lessons that the seder has us pose.

The essence of Passover is that it goes beyond a message to and for the Jewish community. It is a message that can appeal to anyone of any faith or even without a faith tradition. The true essence of this holiday is that no one is truly free until all people are free.

~ Philippians 4:8 NIV

How often do your thoughts stray from that Biblical advice? Regardless of your faith, consider the wisdom in such words. Consider how much more content your life might be if you embraced them.

Our thoughts affect so much about our lives. What we believe is important and where we place our priorities. Or moods. Our health. There is something to be said for mind over matter.

What happens when you allow your thoughts to dwell on mistakes and what might have been? What happens when you focus in the negative rather than the positive, or what you don’t have instead of what you do? Do those thoughts inspire you or contribute to feeling discontent? Do they help you move past unfortunate events or choices? Do they motivate you to pursue possibilities or to languish? Do they help you create a better future? Do they help you to do your best or be the best person you can be?

It seems negative thoughts can easily crowd out positive ones. It’s doubtful that they can share the same mind space. In a given day, how much “mind share” does each occupy in your brain?

Our thoughts affect our behavior and our success. So what you think has a significant impact on your future. It also affects how happy and content you feel today, how at peace you are with yourself. As Socrates said “Contentment is natural wealth.”

When you feel negative thoughts seep into your brain, or lodge themselves there, remind yourself of Philippians 4:8. Release those detrimental thoughts as quickly as they enter your consciousness. Keep your mind on that which is good, noble, lovely, admirable, praiseworthy, constructive and positive. Your contentment and future depend on it

What a sad comment on humanity, yet somehow I believe it must be true for many, if not millions of people. So that got me thinking. What is it that many of us love about dogs that are shortcomings or less predictable in many people? Dogs are . . .

• Loyal and devoted
• Affectionate and loving unconditionally
• Playful
• Curious
• Protective
• Sociable

Additionally, dogs . . .

• Don’t care what we look like, only what we are like
• Will protect and love us when others might not
• Ask very little of us other than being be fed and walked
• Miss us when we are away and joyful when we come home, no matter how long we’ve been gone
• Are thrilled, happy, and devoted when we are kind to them, even in very small ways
• Sense when we need to be comforted and are a great source of comfort and companionship for people who live by themselves as well as those feeling lonely or ill. They love us and are our friends when we need it most.
• Follow rules and understand limits after being trained
• Adapt to our habits
• Live in the moment
• Enjoy expressing affection in public
• Just want to have fun when we play with them . . . and don’t make fun of how we throw when playing fetch
• Mean it when they kiss us.

Willie Morris, in My Dog Skip, wrote: “The dog of your boyhood teaches you a great deal about friendship, and love, and death: Old Skip was my brother. They had buried him under our elm tree, they said — yet this wasn’t totally true. For he really lay buried in my heart.”

And as Dave Barry said, “Dogs need to sniff the ground; it’s how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant dog newspaper, containing all kinds of late-breaking dog news items, which, if they are especially urgent, are often continued in the next yard.” In this regard, dogs seem to have a definite set of priorities and know what they are looking for.

Perhaps we can learn from dogs how we can be better human beings.

The reception was everything it promised to be: a smorgasbord of bold ideas, bold colors, bold photos and artwork highlighting bold women, all adding up to fun. With slides of the dancers gracing the back of the room, it built up to a strong anticipation for the performance.

And there was no let down. While Eyal was the “bold moves” choreographer featured, there were two pieces performed. The first was by another Israeli choreographer, Ohad Naharin. Hubbard Street featured the evening as “This is NOT your mother’s Hubbard Street, and it truly delivered.” The choreography was, as the title suggests, bold, unique, in moments simple yet complex, and wild, stretching the boundaries of what we call dance by filling it with colloquial gestures, vocal expressions by the dancers, and an eclectic sound track ranging from songs and tonal music to words. It was a bright gift of the unexpected. Solos, small groups and large groups of dancers filtered on and off stage, some still while others danced, other times with all dancing different steps as if they weren’t aware there were others on the stage. Two duets were of note, one with a man and a woman which was quite sensitive and graceful, and showing a role reversal once or twice when the woman supported the man, and another, with two men dancing quite beautifully, powerfully and intimately in the type of duet that one usually sees reserved for a man and a woman. The dancers danced tirelessly and seemingly effortlessly, in two very physically demanding pieces, exhibiting only joy.

All the events of the evening reflected one element: passion. From the energy of the coordinators of the reception to the women whose businesses were highlighted, to the excitement of Sharon Eyal, enhanced by her boldly colored Israeli tunic, to the choreography itself and the exceptional performance of the dancers, what came through everywhere in the evening was the passion of everyone involved. It fed the reception so that air was singed with it. It was evident in the designs of the dances by the choreographers, and oh so visible in the dancers themselves, who never lost the smiles and openness in their eyes throughout a very rigorous and demanding evening of movement.

Each of us has a passion. It is what brings excitement and fulfillment to our lives. What isyourpassion? Is it for the arts or crafts, as in those involved in “Bold Moves for Bold Women,” or does it lie somewhere else? If you are living your life expressing your passion, you know exactly what I mean when I say it brings excitement and fulfillment. If you are not exploring and involving yourself in expressing your passion, why not? If you aren’t sure what your passion is, there is no time like the present discover what it might be. And if you do know what it is, today is a great day to take even a small moment to invest in bringing it into your life in a more tangible way. Boldness awaits!

Robin Damsky

The Find Fulfill Flourish Project has created such a model. We are a small start-up organization but we are committed to partnering with charitable organizations that wish to use the platform we have developed to generate additional funds. We also design our workshops and speaking engagements so they can double as fundraisers. These are integrated in our business processes.

Here are some of the ways our charitable entrepreneurial business model helps organization’s flourish:

• Our “Partnership Program”. Nonprofits can generate donations from people referred to FindFulfillFlourish.com. When these individuals purchase anything, we will donate a percentage of amount paid, which increases with the volume of business. Details are on our Partnership Program page.
• Offering Find Fulfill Flourish as a fundraising project. Organizations can purchase our books at wholesale and sell them at the retail price. It’s an inspirational item for gift stores and to sell to supporters. It’s a great way for youth groups to generate fund by selling a meaningful product. More information is at FindfulFillFlourish.com on the “Your Fundraising Partner” page.
• Sponsoring Find Fulfill Flourish workshops and presentations. We work with organizations in planning and delivering an inspirational and thought-provoking program that can double as a fundraiser. We develop a mutually beneficial revenue sharing arrangement. More information is the “Your Fundraising Partner” page.
• Our “Organizational Application Guide”. This guide helps organizational leaders and boards bring the Eight Dynamics embedded in the Find Fulfill Flourish process to life in their organizations.

More information on all of these Find Fulfill Flourish Project features can be found on our website. Join our community and take advantage of all we have to offer. If you have additional ideas on how we can extend our model or improve it, we’d love to hear them.

Steve Weitzenkorn

Japan’s preparation and planning for national disasters are in stark contrast to Haiti’s. Similar natural catastrophes struck both countries, however the way each nation prepared for such events, helped its citizens, and responded in the moment were very different. And they highlight the differences in their values and the impact of those values.

Japan was proactive. They have long had very strict building codes to prevent or minimize property damage, human injuries and causalities. The losses would be far, far greater without them. Haiti did not make such investments. Construction was shoddy and buildings collapsed with little or no resistance to the earthquake and tsunami. Far more lives were lost or crippled as a result. For Japan, citizen protection and loss prevention was and is a high priority. Haiti seemed to not consider this at all. It was not a practiced value.

Japan had contingency plans in place. Rapid response teams rushed to help citizens and manage the disaster as quickly and as much as possible. The magnitude of the catastrophe still overwhelmed them, yet without it the human and property losses would be much greater. Haiti seemed to have no such plans in place. There were few first responders and they seemed ill prepared. The heavy lifting came from the international community. The values of each government drove the decisions and outcomes in both places. Japan’s values put human safety first. In Haiti, it seems other values took precedence. They each made value-based choices.

Japan’s policies and practices show a commitment to providing benefits and support for the many. Haiti’s history is one in which government policies have largely benefited the few – those with power and on the inside. These practices also reflect clear differences in values.

After the disaster struck, Japan’s leaders tirelessly communicated with the people and did all they could to adapt to the magnitude of the crisis. Haiti’s leaders almost disappeared from sight. Japan’s leaders were accountable and focused. Haiti’s leaders seemed far less so.

The values practiced by the leaders of both counties vividly illustrate the impact values can have in the moment of crisis and the aftermath. Emergency readiness, planning, competence, and resource deployment (or lack thereof) can have a huge impact – whether on saving lives, treating the injured, alleviating trauma, or minimizing damage. Japan’s emergency and medical teams are working around the clock, responding to innumerable ripple effects and the needs of its people, making a horrific situation as tolerable as possible. Imagine if Japan was as poorly prepared as Haiti.

You might say that this is the difference between a relatively wealthy country like Japan and an impoverished one like Haiti. I would submit that those differences also reflect the differences in values between the leaders and culture of both island nations.

As daunting as the massive challenge is facing Japan, including the risk of nuclear meltdowns, I am willing to bet that huge numbers of people will not be living tents, make-shift shelters, or unsanitary conditions one year after the earthquake and tsunami as they still are in Haiti. Think about how each country demonstrates its compassion and care for the citizens who have suffered and the impact that has. Japan has swung into action and will sustain that effort. It will rebound far faster and much more effectively than Haiti from a similar, if not greater, natural disaster – reflecting the values of its culture.

You may want to reflect on your own values. Bringing all this down to a more personal level, are you more like Japan or Haiti? 

How do your values show up in your life? How do they affect its course and the choices you make? How do they affect how you respond to and rebound from personal earthquakes and tsunamis?

I spoke with a lovely man named Tony, who, within five minutes, had a reservation set for my daughter at an airport hotel, with shuttle service and complimentary breakfast. All for a reasonable price. I exhaled when I learned she had arrived safely in her room.

When my phone rang at 7:30 this morning, I was sure my daughter was calling to let me know she was boarding her flight. When I heard, “Mom, I have a problem,” my stomach turned. “The hotel didn’t give me my wake up call. I asked for one every fifteen minutes starting at 6:30. None of them came. I just woke up.”

Her flight was in 30 minutes. No way she was going to make it.

“I’m going to call the airlines,” she said. “I’ll call you back.”

Fifteen minutes, twenty… no call back. Nervously, I tried her. “I’m on hold. Gotta go,” was her reply. Another ten minutes passed before her call came. I heard the smile on her face and the relief in her voice. “The guy was really nice. I was crying the whole time. He got me on a later flight, and I told him about the cancellation last night and the wake up calls and he didn’t even charge me extra.”

Okay, so I won’t be able to pick her up because I have to be at work when she gets in, but at least she’ll be on her way.

I phoned the hotel, asking to speak to the manager, letting her know that none of the wake up calls came. While she is looking into providing us compensation for this, she went out of her way to let me know that she would offer my daughter full generosity and use of the room and hotel well beyond the normal check out time. She is extending every courtesy that she can think of.

What impresses me about all the people we encountered in this unexpected situation is their kindness. Flights get cancelled all the time; for weather, for lack of passengers, for concerns with flightworthiness. This happens. Emergency contingency plans also occur. And people make mistakes. We all know and have experienced that not everyone extends kindness, not even in an emergency, not even when circumstances beyond one’s control have prohibited someone from fulfilling his or her obligation. The expediency and warmth that Tony exhibited to me last night, the generosity that my daughter received from the airline’s reservation attendant this morning, the special extensions being offered by the hotel manager while she researches additional compensation, all of these have brought more ease and warmth into a difficult and frightening situation.

We can do our jobs effectively without being kind. We can do our jobs and live our lives without being generous. But the world is a harsher place when people are terse, cold, strict or stingy. All it takes is a softening of the heart to help turn someone else’s rough day into a laughable adventure or a smoother ride. If we can imagine ourselves in their place, and think of the kindness we would like extended to us, it becomes natural to begin to extend that same kindness to them. This is not only a good business tactic, but one for our personal lives as well.

I am grateful for the generosity of these three individuals.

Princeton:

Purpose.

It’s that little flame

That lights a fire

Under your ass.

Ha!

Purpose.

It keeps you going strong

Like a car with a full

Tank of gas.

Everyone else has a purpose,

So what’s mine?

Oh look.

Here’s a penny.

It’s from the year I was born.

It’s a sign!

Ha! Ba ba ba ba doo doo doo doo doo.

I don’t know how I know,

But I’m gonna find my purpose.

I don’t know where I’m gonna look,

But I’m gonna find my purpose.

Gotta find out.

Don’t wanna wait.

Got to make sure that my life will be great.

Gotta find my purpose.

Before it’s too late.

Ensemble:

He’s gonna find his purpose.

Princeton:

Whoa ooh oh.

Princeton and Ensemble:

I’m [He’s] gonna find my [his] purpose.

Ensemble:

He’s gonna find his purpose.

Princeton:

Yeaaah yeah yea.

Princeton and Ensemble:

I’m [He’s] gonna find my [his] purpose.

Princeton:

Could be far.

Could be near.

Could take a week

A month

A year

At a job.

Or smoking grass.

Ha!

Maybe at a pottery class.

Could it be?

Yes it could.

Something’s coming.

Something good.

What will it be? Where will it be?

My purpose in life is a mystery.

Gotta find my purpose.

Gotta find me.

Ensemble:

Your’re gonna find your purpose.

Princeton:

Pur- pur- purpose

Yeah yeah.

I gotta find me!

Have you found your purpose? Helping people find their purpose is one of the goals of Find Fulfill Flourish. Our subtitle is “Discover Your Purpose with LifePath GPS.” Try some of the exercises on our website or purchase the book. See if they help you on your journey.

Visit our new website, see the video: Take the FREE Guiding Values Exercise.